YEAH BABY this is what ZEN looks like, motherfuckaaaaaaaaaas——!!!!
(tried to think of the most zen thing I could write to celebrate 365 days of meditation, and that was the first thing to come to mind. I feel like I’m totally nailing this whole “transcendental” thing.)
So… how much does the meditation habit help? Really, truly? A little. So does prayer (I’ve made a practice of both — and don’t worry, I’m not about to get all whoo-whoo spiritual on you). When people talk about meditation or prayer, they sometimes talk about transformational change, and maybe that’s what some people experience. In my case, the positive effects have always been incremental, almost invisible on a daily basis. Tiny… but real. There comes a point where sometimes, in the midst of a particularly intense grouch, I’ll find myself suddenly doing some mental noting (usually in the voice of Joseph Goldstein, one of the teachers on the 10% App, which is what I use for meditation). I’ll think, sort of quietly: judging. Or: exhaustion. And that moment of irritation or depression becomes a wasp trapped under a wineglass. It’s still there, but it can’t sting.
And it isn’t just that it tempers my somewhat habitual glooms. There’s a century old wall near my house, caked in moss. You ask yourself: who enjoys a mossy wall? A: this guy. Don’t know if I would’ve even noticed it, though, if I couldn’t sometimes draw myself out of my head and just see what’s around me — a fundamental part of the whole meditation thing, I guess.
I’m still a guy who gets very grim when running short on sleep, though. Still a guy prone to finding the cloud in any blue sky. No magic wands. The word for daily meditation is practice, and that’s the correct term. Like any practice — piano, skiing — the more you do it, the more capable you become… and the more aware you are of how much you still can’t do, still don’t know. (See what I mean about finding the cloud in any blue sky??)